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| About my slave | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| Apr. 2nd, 2005 @ 08:43 pm Comedy Is DEAD | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Mitch Hedberg is dead. He was one of the greatest comedians ever. I base alot of my humor from him. He will be missed. crushedPut down the basketball get back in the field: Mitch Hedberg CD |
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| Mar. 14th, 2005 @ 08:43 pm Someday we'll find it, The rainbow connection | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
 Hey kid! I'ma kumputer!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Rainbow Connection-Kermit The Frog I been trying to download some weird stuff lately but I've run out of idears. Oh well. I've made a list of CD's I want and you peepull better get them for me. 1. Born To Add: The Great Rock & Roll From Sesame Street 2.Sonny Sharrock: Space Ghost (Coast To Coast) music 3.John Trubee & The Ugly Janitors Of America: The Communists Are Coming To Kill Us! 4.Muddy Waters: Electric Mud ( I don't know why I don't have this yet.) Is this song more relavent today than ever before? No. Does it kick ass? Yes Indeed. I am Sr. Awesome.
Dr. Teeth: Dr. Teeth: (spoken) Hey, Floyd, take a verse! Floyd Pepper: [Musical bridge] Floyd: Animal: Floyd: (Chorus) Dr. Teeth: |
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| Mar. 9th, 2005 @ 08:27 pm a doo ah diddy,diddy dum diddy, what the hell? | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
sos here's tha haps. I dragged out all my records and pick out all the psychedelic ones. You know, Jefferson Airplane, Mothers Of Invention, ELP,Todd Rundgren(Utopia),etc. I am now on a mission to listen to all of my psychedelic albums. Thank you very much, Sr. Television. deh, Juicy Fruit!Put down the basketball get back in the field: ELP-The Endless Enigma pt 1 |
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| Mar. 6th, 2005 @ 09:52 pm disregard all other megaphones that may tell you to jump out of your window | |||
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Put down the basketball get back in the field: The Shondells- Crimson & Clover
Does anyone have those friends that make you feel like nothing else is happening in your life whenever you are around them? That you don't have to be anybody but yourself? That's Fred and Keith and Dev for me. I feel like there's no high school, there's no girl troubles, there's no anything except for fun and absurdity whenever I'm around them. I just thought I needed to say that.
I get by with a little help from my friends, I get high with a little help from my friends- Wonder Years theme...
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| Feb. 21st, 2005 @ 07:48 pm Sto'l This From Keith | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
[series 1 ] AHH! WHAT THE HELL!!!!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Flaming Lips Name: Alistair Birthday: July 21 Birthplace: Springfield Current Location: Springfield Eye Color: I can't see my eyes Hair Color: brown Righty or Lefty: Righty Zodiac Sign: cancer Font: Better font than yours [ series 2 - your favorite ] Music: anything except emo and nu-metal Cartoon: Tom Goes To The Mayor Color: green Car: Green Hornet car Slushy Flavor: purple Magazine: Spin TV Show: Gilmore Girls Song at the Moment: Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots-Flaming Lips Language: Klingon Spice Girl: Scary Spice Food & Beverage: Macaroni and Cheese, WCP Subject in School: history Weekend Activity: playin around with sounds Frozen Yogurt: fuck that Roller Coaster: Mr. Toads Wild Ride [ series 3 - what is ] Your most overused phrase:"I dunno" or "*grunts*" First thing you thought when you woke up:Why, the hell? first feature you notice of opposite sex: tits Best name for a Butler: Helmsworth Wussiest Sport: Championship Bear Tickling Your best feature: My sexiness Your greatest fear: becoming a depressed fucker Your greatest accomplishment: learning to walk? Your most missed memory: childhood [ series 4 - you prefer ] Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi McDonald's or Burger King: McDonald's Single or Group Dates: umm Adidas or Nike: Adidas Chicken nuggets or Chicken fingers: chickens have fingers? Dogs or Cats: cats, bitch Rugrats or Doug: Doug Single or Taken: Single Monica or Brandy: who the hell is Monica? Tupac or Jay-Z: Pac Shania Twain or LeAnn Rhymes:fuckin Shania man Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton One pillow or Two: three.......bitch Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate Hot chocolate or Hot cocoa: I don't like hot Cappucino or Coffee: Cappucino [ series 5 - do you ] Shower everyday: yes Have a crush: a crush, this isn't third grade Think you've been in love: fuck love Want to go to college: nah Like high school: yeah Want to get married:eh Type correctly: yes Believe in yourself:....? Have any tattoos? Not currently Where: -- Have any piercings? no Where: nowhere Get motion sickness:yeah Think you're a health freak: No Get along with your parents:sometimes Like thunderstorms: fuckin a [ series 6 - the future ] Age you plan to be married: 30 Number and names of children: 1 or 2...names? Where will you be at age 20: livin in some big city Dream wedding: traditional......but with nekkidness How do you want to die: in a gunfight with the government...and take a few with people with me Dream job: makin music Country you'd like to visit: Scotland [ series 7 - opposite sex ] Best eye color: are you fucking retarded? Best hair color: brown or black Short or long hair: medium Best height: a little shorter than Alistair Best weight: No Fat Chicks Best clothes: no clothes Best first date location: nekkid Best first kiss location: anywhere [ series 8 - other ] Last time you slept with a stuffed animal: a while ago Rings before you answer the phone: umm What's on your mousepad: don't got one How many houses you've lived in: kafive Schools you've gone to: Ridgely, Franklin, Springfield Bedroom carpet color: blue Shave your head for $5,000?: Sure Stranded on a desert island. Take three things. No people: Stereo, Life's supply of batteries, every CD known to man |
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| Feb. 13th, 2005 @ 07:55 pm Rick Mason made a synthesizer | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
 someday, I shall eat my facePut down the basketball get back in the field: DJ Dangermouse Ummmmm, I don't havemuch to say. So I shall say random shit. I want to become a DJ, I just need a cool DJ moniker. Something cool. Yeah. Molly Hatchet is the perfect napping music. Techno music is my new favorite masturbation music. Especially Prodigy, KMFDM, and the Smurfs theme in techno rave form. It get's me hot. There are more techno masturbation artists but I can't think of them right now. Tenacious D movie in the works, no release date yet, directed by Liam Lynch ( the musical genius behind " My United States of Whatevah!"). I happy. So put on some Molly Hatchet cuz I'm takin a nap. |
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| Feb. 9th, 2005 @ 08:30 pm ROCK FIIIIIIIIIIIISTAH!!! | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
 whoa, that doesn't go there!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Elvis Presley-Hound Dog I am BADASS. Today in gym, I hit three people in the face with a volleyball. Not with three throws. Not with two throws. But with, you guessed it, ONE THROW. I am extremely badass.
DO You RESPEK KNUCKLES? |
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| Feb. 7th, 2005 @ 08:30 pm jug-band humor | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Here are some CD's/Vynils that I want. Note: There is no use for this post, I'm just extrememly bored. If you happen to have any of these CD's you should burn them for me.  WI! WI! I'm French!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Les Dudek Goodbye, Babylon: Southern Gospel Johnny Cash: Unearthed Love,Peace,Poetry: Mexican Psychedelic Music Badly Drawn Boy: One Plus One Is One The Von Bondies: PAwn Shop Heart Cee-Lo: Cee-Lo Green is the Soul Machine Depeche Mode: Cathching Up With Depeche Mode The Polyphonic Spree: Together We're Heavey The Flaming Lips: Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots Supergrass: Life On Other Planets Marvin Gaye: What's Going On? Bow Wow Wow: Bow Wow Wow |
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| Feb. 3rd, 2005 @ 09:18 pm Ba'ay We gawa go naw! | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Well, I was sick today. Staying home from school would have been good except for the fact that I have math quiz tomorrow. I'm gonna try and get out of it. Wish me some fuckin luck. Ms. Whigger is such a fucking fat bitch. This one black kid in my class thinks she is sexy. That, my friends, is why there will never be a black president. oh, yeah, that's gooood!oooh!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Louie,Louie- The Kingsmen |
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| Jan. 18th, 2005 @ 03:37 pm Who's this little cute kid? | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
 What the hell?Put down the basketball get back in the field: Carlos Guitarlos If anyone can guess who this adorable little kid is they get 20 friendship points.
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| Jan. 17th, 2005 @ 09:15 pm So I says to Marlene," Honey, youse gots to use da cweam" Capeesh? | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Who else here agrees that the motion picture The Terminal was completely un-nessecary. As are all Tom Hanks movies. Let's just go down the list. Hey, what's that?Put down the basketball get back in the field: X- Johnny Hit and Run Paulene 1.Forrest Gump- An endearing tale about a retard and his many heart-warming achievements. Rainman was so much better. Retards and movies only mix when Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise are involved. 2.Castaway- Why? Castaway was bullshit. A story about some dude who gets lost on an island. Luckily, I can't think of any movie to compare this to. Three fucking hours of a shirtless Tom Hanks talking to a fucking Volleyball. 3.You've Got Mail-Bullshit. Complete and utter bullshit. Why does Tom Hanks take such shitty roles? I know because he's a dumbass. Meg Ryan was in this movie also. That doubles the shit value. I will not list anymore because if I do I might die. It seems to me that Tom Hanks shits out movie after movie. His only good movie was Bachelor Party. That's only because there were tits in it. Face it, Tom Hanks is a shitty actor. I blame him for 9/11 and The War in Iraq. I also blame him for spousal abuse, child abuse, puppy mutilation, and the death of hundreds of poor black folk everyday. If Tom Hanks were more like Emilio Estevez, this world would be a much better place. Damn you Tom Hanks, damn you to hell. |
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| Jan. 16th, 2005 @ 07:08 pm (no subject) Gay | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
-That was a nice party. Do you think Carol from payroll and Mike from shipping will "hook up"? You gayPut down the basketball get back in the field: Necromantix -No, sir, Mike is married. -Change course, Carol must be warned!! well, I haven't updated in a while so that means I have nothing to say. Damn,I'm boring. |
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| Jan. 1st, 2005 @ 08:59 pm Lyrics that are fucking awesome | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
I LIKE TO LAUGH AT RETARDS Geddy LeeI LIKE TO LAUGH AT CRIPPLES I LIKE TO MAKE FUN OF GAYS I LIKE TO BEAT WOMAN I LIKE ASSUMING BLACK PEOPLE STOLE SOMETHING I LIKE ASSUMING JEWS JERK OFF TO PHOTOS OF BANKS I LIKE ASSUMING CHINESE PEOPLE CANT DRIVE I LIKE ASSUMING WOMAN ARE DUMB CUNTS I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE ASSUMING BLACK PEOPLE STOLE SOMETHING I LIKE ASSUMING JEWS JERK OFF TO PHOTOS OF BANKS I LIKE ASSUMING CHINESE PEOPLE CANT DRIVE I LIKE ASSUMING WOMAN ARE DUMB CUNTS I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I LIKE BEING IGNORANT I DON'T WANT TO READ THE PAPER I DON'T WANT TO SEE THE NEWS I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON I JUST WANT TO KEEP HATING YOU ---------------------------------------- DEADBEAT DADS ARE FUCKING COOL DEADBEAT DADS ARE FUCKING COOL DEADBEAT DADS ARE FUCKING COOL DEADBEAT DADS ARE FUCKING COOL DON'T GIVE THAT STUPID CUNT A CENT DON'T PAY THAT FUCKING BRAT'S RENT DON'T PAY MONEY FOR IT TO EAT IF YOU'RE COOL, YOU'LL BE A DEADBEAT ---------------------------------------- HE LISTENS TO THE FUCKING SMITHS HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE HE WEARS A TRENCHCOAT HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE HE WEARS BLACK TIGHTS HE WRITES POETRY HE WEARS BLACK LIPSTICK UNDER HIS MUSTACHE HE'S GOT A ROLLERCOASTER HAIRCUT HE DYES IT JET BLACK WHEN HIS HAIR IS REALLY BROWN JUST LIKE HIS MUSTACHE HE WANTS TO BE ROBERT SMITH BUT WITH A MUSTACHE HE'S A FUCKING ART FAG HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE ---------------------------------------- You came twice last year like a sears catalog Cause your last boyfriend makes love like boss hogg Well now you’re seeing me but soon I’ll have you seeing god Cause girl I’ll get you panting like you’re pavlov’s dog Like a dc-10: guaranteed to go down But baby your black box is the one that I found I’ll give you the gift that keeps on givin’ it won’t cost you any money Then she grabbed me by the ears and said kiss me where it smells funny So down I go like I’m 2000 flushes I can tell I’m doing something right by the way that she blushes She’s one that’s speechless, I’m the one that’s tongue tied She’s thinking holy mackerel I’m thinking tuna on the side There must be something wrong with al pacino’s nose Cause the scent of a woman is like rotten tomatoes Yeah I’m snorkeling for clams and it doesn’t matter if I wanna be Don’t come up for air until you kiss me where it smells funny Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base I can tell that the cherry’s ripe by the way it tastes Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties And then drink it while eating out down at the seafood shanty Drop my face below her waist and stay on third base I can tell that the cherry’s ripe by the way it tastes Yeah I could make a lot of wine with the yeast I find inside her panties And then drink it while eating out down at the seafood shanty ---------------------------------------- |
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| Dec. 27th, 2004 @ 06:51 pm Party Hard | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Hey everybody, Merry Christmass. I got some quality stuff this year. Surprisingly. I got a Funkadelic CD, a Red Hot Chili Peppers CD, some band shirts( Doors and RHCP), ummmm.....an Andrew W.K. CD which is fucking awesome. Oh, I also got two fuckloads of old vynils from Ean (My sister's boyfriend) and a new turntable. I think Keither might get a boner when he sees which albums I got. Keep on keepin' on? happyPut down the basketball get back in the field: Ready To Die- A.W.K |
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| Dec. 20th, 2004 @ 08:13 pm lookin mighty fine in my coon-skin cap | |||
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I had sex with yo mama: bwapo
Do you remember when the days gonePut down the basketball get back in the field: Bouncing Souls by or is there no point for us to even try Back when we didn't have a care in the world, Getting drunk and chasing girls Do you remember the days gone past and how we always wanted the good times to last The time we spent hanging out is how we learned what life is about Everything is set for the perfect night when music is playing and it sounds just right It gets inside and helps you to be all that you want and you are free Those times that we all hoped would last it seems that they've gone by so fast I woke up one day and i was 25 with a hell of a hangover and some demented sense of pride All we had was our dreams that's all we needed to be free After the party came and went i found myself half bent I had to stop and look around and my friends were all i found All these things i thought were wrong but these contradictions they made me strong I know i can be free and it all came from inside of me All we had was our dreams that's all we needed to be free Do you remember? I do! |
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| Dec. 10th, 2004 @ 09:38 pm pie-time! | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
ok so here's a game because I am bored out of my fucking skull: I call it "Top 5" boredPut down the basketball get back in the field: Less Than Jake- Johnny Quest Thinks We're Sellouts Top 5 bands/recording artists: 5.The Ramones 4.Lynyrd Skynyrd 3.Velvet Underground 2.The Doors 1. Bob Dylan Top 5 songs: 5.White Light, White Heat- Velvet Underground 4.It Ain't Me- Bob Dylan 3. Roadhouse Blues- The Doors 2.Bo Diddley-Bo Diddley 1.Can't Stop-RHCP Top 5 things you own: 5. Stereo 4. Jeans 3. chair in bedroom 2. guitar 1. Army shirt Top 5 desert-island albums: 5. One Nation Under A Groove- Funkadelic 4. At Folsom Prison- Johnny Cash 3.Meet The Beatles-The Beatles(before their semi-convoluted hippe psychedelia days. Yay for the original, poppy Beatles!) 2.Kind Of Blue- Miles Davis 1.The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan- Bob Dylan Top 5 favorite movies: 5.Quadrophenia 4.Rebel Without A Cause 3.The Doors 2.American Pop 1.High Fidelity that's all I could think of for now. I could make better lists but these are just thrown together quickly. Please, be my guest and play along. |
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| Dec. 10th, 2004 @ 05:12 pm Myua Myua Myua! | |||
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I had sex with yo mama: psuedo-german
hey, I got a new livejournal thingy. It's sweet because James Dean is awesome. Strusel!Put down the basketball get back in the field: Bob Dylan- It Ain't Me |
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| Dec. 9th, 2004 @ 05:11 pm Respect | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Dimebag Darrell R.I.P angryPut down the basketball get back in the field: Pantera-Walk |
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| Dec. 8th, 2004 @ 08:09 pm We'll Meet Again | |||
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I had sex with yo mama:
Well, today I hurt Julia again.ON ACCIDENT. Well, actually she said my dick was small so I socked her in the arm. Hmmmmm. You all should listen to Johnny Cash. He kicks ass. I actually cried once while listening to one of his songs. I think it was Cocaine Blues. I'm listening to him right now and it's giving me goosebumps. The man can do no wrong.  contemplativePut down the basketball get back in the field: Johnny Cash-A Boy Named Sue Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.-----James Dean. |
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| Dec. 5th, 2004 @ 09:15 am The Brothers Ponch | |||
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I had sex with yo mama: poncho-ly
I got a poncho! It's green and white and black. If you don't like it, I will shank you.Put down the basketball get back in the field: John Mellencamp |
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